Just a bit milder

The Mindfulness Workbook contains six chapters with interviews, insights and lots of exercises.  One of those insights is how to be just a bit milder. In this blog we share two tips.

Listen to that inner voice for a whole day
Spend a day becoming aware of all the unkind or disparaging things you say to yourself or about yourself. Realize that these thoughts or emotions are not necessarily true. Observing these thoughts objectively works better when you’re in the now, less concerned with yesterday or tomorrow or what anyone else thinks of you. When an unpleasant thought or emotion arises, try to stay with it rather than wanting to push it away. Simply observe with a kind of curiosity what you’re feeling and what is happening in your body. This often results in more rest and relaxation. We all make mistakes: that’s part of being human. Therefore you don’t have to punish yourself.

Accept yourself as you are
Compassion is an attitude, a milder way of seeing, thinking and feeling—about yourself and others. It’s different than self-esteem. If you are a perfectionist and critical of yourself, you will often let your self-esteem depend on things you have no control over: your achievements, or others having to like you or your appearance. Your self-esteem gets soaked up by events that are often accidental. Whereas selfcompassion means accepting yourself for precisely who you are—warts, bad habits and all…

Want to read the other tips as well? The article can be found in the Mindfulness Workbook, which is on sale in our webshop.

Text Sjoukje van de Kolk, Otje van der Lelij